2.29.2004

A few nights ago I was watching a movie with a friend (that one where Nicholas Cage wins the lottery and shares with a waitress). He had seen it before, but I hadn't... I wanted him to tell me the end so that I'd know what to expect. At first he wouldn't, he said it would ruin the movie... My point was that I like to know beforehand so that I can be ready for what happens. I wouldn't stop watching, but it might change my mindset while watching. After I thought about it a bit though, I realised that wasn't true. If I know that a movie isn't going to end the way I want it to, I stop it at a point that makes me happy.

It made me wonder if this is part of a bigger control issue for me. Not sure if I can put it into words... But I wonder if I only do things if I have a general idea of how they'll turn out? I hope not.. I'm going to make an effort to work on that. Get over the control issues. Just go with it.

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